I’m not watching Peppa Pig in the middle of the night – a poem

I’m not watching Peppa Pig in the middle of the night – a poem

I tucked you in at 7
Tip-toed out, turned off the light
So I’m not watching Peppa Pig in the middle of the night

They told me you’d sleep through by now
How I wish they had been right
Because I’m not watching Peppa Pig in the middle of the night

I brought you into bed you see
So we could snuggle tight
Not so you could watch Peppa Pig in the middle of the night

Please, mummy needs her beauty sleep
For she is looking shite
There’s no way we’re watching Peppa Pig in the middle of the night

Lie down now and rest your head
Stop putting up a fight
I won’t give in, there is no Peppa Pig in here tonight

You can lash out all you like my dear
You can scratch and you can bite (evil baby)
It doesn’t mean you’re watching Peppa Pig in the middle of the night

I can sing you off to sleep my love
Don’t scream with all your might
It’s better than watching Peppa Pig in the middle of the night

You’re not a pretty cryer Moo
In fact, you look a sight
And it won’t help you watch Peppa Pig in the middle of the night

Now you’ve woken poor old Daddy up
And given him a fright
He’s not going to let you watch Peppa Pig in the middle of the night

Is it because I told you ‘no’ today
Are you angry out of spite?
Do you even know why you want Peppa Pig in the middle of the night?

I’ve got no more ideas left
So a poem I will write
For there is absolutely no way on planet earth and all the moon and stars and galaxy and anything else your tiny brain cannot yet comprehend, THAT WE WILL SIT AND WATCH SODDING PEPPA PIG IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BLASTED NIGHT.

So please go back to sleep, ta.

Rhyming with Wine


  1. October 25, 2017 / 11:59 pm

    You are a stronger woman than me! I would have given in and handed over the iPad! #dreamteam

    • muffintopmummyblog
      October 26, 2017 / 9:17 am

      Hahaha! There may end up being a sequel ‘damn it woman, just watch Peppa Pig all bloody night then – a poem’ 😂 x

  2. October 27, 2017 / 6:46 am

    Brilliant poem. Fortunately my little girl hasn’t discovered Peppa Pig yet. But I know this day will come! #blogstravaganza

    • muffintopmummyblog
      October 27, 2017 / 1:55 pm

      Haha thank you. Yes, it’s kind of my fault for introducing her… but I don’t realise 11 month olds actually take notice of these things! My bad… x

    • muffintopmummyblog
      October 27, 2017 / 1:56 pm

      Thank you!! 😊 x x

    • muffintopmummyblog
      October 27, 2017 / 1:56 pm

      Haha I always do that! X

  3. October 27, 2017 / 9:46 am

    Great poem! Totally feeling you! My youngest is only just discovering Peppa Pig. Oh, the joys. #blogstravaganza

    • muffintopmummyblog
      October 27, 2017 / 1:57 pm

      Haha I didn’t mind her first time round… now, 50 of the same episodes late, I can’t stand that bloomin Pig! X

  4. October 27, 2017 / 11:17 am

    Haha, very good! We don’t have tv in the middle of the night either. 6 am on a Saturday is a different story though 😉 #blogstravaganza

    • muffintopmummyblog
      October 27, 2017 / 1:59 pm

      Haha oh yes, weekend mornings will be a must! X

  5. October 27, 2017 / 12:03 pm

    Made me laugh because this is so true! My little one asks for Peppa Pig at night too… and when he doesn’t get it, he resorts to books and yes, its Peppa Pig. #blogstravaganza

    • muffintopmummyblog
      October 27, 2017 / 2:00 pm

      Hahahaha oh no – we’ve also just started becoming obsessed with books too… so you’re telling me I’m going to have 2 issues to deal with shortly instead of sleep!? 🙈😂 x

  6. October 27, 2017 / 1:44 pm

    Ah I have so much love for this! I’m so with you, TV in the middle of the night is a no go! Thanks so much for sharing with #Blogstravaganza, it’s always great to have you! Xx

    • muffintopmummyblog
      October 27, 2017 / 2:02 pm

      Haha thank you! Sometimes all you want to do is give in and get some peace… but I can’t deal with all night Peppa parties! It’s great to join in 😊 x

  7. October 27, 2017 / 6:08 pm

    Hahaha, I love this, as much as I feel for you:( Being up all night with a baby/ toddler that doesn’t sleep is tough enough – to bear Peppa’s snort on top of that takes courage!!! Hope things get better…

    • muffintopmummyblog
      October 27, 2017 / 6:24 pm

      Hahaha I see Peppa in my nightmares now… obnoxious pigs are the worst! X

  8. October 27, 2017 / 8:45 pm

    Brilliant and so very accurate! The middle of the night is the worst for moments like these they just don’t take No for an answer, and as much as I love Peppa Pig after about the 6th episode in a row I want to glue my own eyeballs shut with playdough xx #blogstravaganza

    • muffintopmummyblog
      October 28, 2017 / 11:28 pm

      Hahaha yes!! The middle of the night is NEVER a good time for inconvenient tantrums x

  9. October 27, 2017 / 8:46 pm

    Oh we’ve been there! But please mummy, just one short video mummy, I promise I’ll go to sleep after mummy. I’ve only given in once but that was after a midnight trip to the out of hours doctors so everything was already screwed up! Stay strong. #blogstravaganza

    • muffintopmummyblog
      October 28, 2017 / 11:29 pm

      Haha I haven’t given in yet – but sounds like yours was totally justified… that can be my Peppa Pig midnight benchmark 😊 x

  10. October 28, 2017 / 5:44 pm

    Shudder, one day they grow out of Pepper.pig. Sadly they move onto something equally as annoying X #blogstravaganza

    • muffintopmummyblog
      October 28, 2017 / 11:31 pm

      Haha noooooo! Is there any hope for peace and quiet (and sleep)!? Well, except perhaps not having children in the first place 😂 x

    • muffintopmummyblog
      October 29, 2017 / 10:14 pm

      Haha thank you! If you don’t laugh, you cry 😂 x

  11. October 31, 2017 / 5:34 pm

    As much as my eldest loves Peppa Pig she’s not asked for it in the night. #Blogstravaganza

    • muffintopmummyblog
      October 31, 2017 / 10:00 pm

      Haha can we swap? X

  12. talkingmums1
    November 1, 2017 / 2:06 pm

    Haha! Totally agree with you, definitely no Peppa Pig in the night! x

    • muffintopmummyblog
      November 1, 2017 / 2:47 pm

      It’s hard enough in the day 😂 x

  13. November 2, 2017 / 8:33 am

    This is brilliant!!!! I can’t say I miss Peppa so much…that bloody voice!! #Blogstravaganza

    • muffintopmummyblog
      November 2, 2017 / 9:32 am

      Haha tell me about it… she’s already in my dreams anyway 😂 thank you lovely x

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